Husbands who attend to their professions with all peace of mind and children grow in a carefree manner because they have their wives and moms respectively to take good care of their homes and everyday life matters. Today, house wives have a vast role as a home maker.They are supposed to:
- Do all the grocery, shopping, repair work and decor at home
- Attend to their banks’ matters, and, doctors’ appointments for themselves and their family members
- Pick and drop their kids to their schools, tuition centers, co-curricular places, friends and shopping malls
- Supervise, full-time, their maids and servants
- Entertain guests; and, get along with family and friends well
- Teach and groom their kids
- Take care of the family members (Their families and their in-laws)
These are 24 hours services that take their full-time attention and energies. Still, by the end of the day the husband says, Oh tum sara din kerti kia ho? (I have my full day job, but do you have anything to do that hinders in keeping everything in order at home?). Unfortunately, as a new trend, the entire society looked down upon housewives in the same manner except the other homemaker women.
Thus, thinking that they don’t have a significant and valuable role in life despite playing an irreplaceable role in the society, either they lose their self-esteem or think of starting their careers to be acknowledged as worthy persons. Or, they want to compete with men ignoring their fundamental roles. Is it fair? Is it healthy to push the home-makers to this end?
So, the young women in Pakistan, who are more educated and skilled for jobs and have job opportunities as well opt for being career-oriented even in the very beginning of their married lives. Some of them have their moms at their backs to baby sit their newly born or young kids, and some look for daycares, in any case they have to face the job and family stress simultaneously. Despite all their efforts they are guilty that they are unable to attend to their kids properly. It is an inadvisable option for both young kids and their moms. The young kids are generally deprived of the love, company, health care, training and teaching of their mothers. So, even at the kindergarten, these kids have more health, educational, behavioral, and psychological problems than the kids of stay-at-home moms. Furthermore, a mom’s absence weakens not the only mom-child bond but also the entire family bonding.
Jobs-and-family-together is a dream, which has made the relationship between husband and wife very materialistic. It does not let both the life-partners enjoy a real lovable relationship where both are taking care of their unique roles. Where women are appreciative of the monitory support and companionship of their husbands, and, where husbands are proud of their women for their roles as terrific housewives, moms and family care-takers (taking good care of all their relatives and friends).
Though career gives women opportunities to self-growth and financial independence, but should we opt for it at the cost of our kids, homes and peace of mind. I believe women should be acknowledged for their invaluable roles as a family women. They should be encouraged to invest their early married years in their kids, home, and their marriages without the worries of being on jobs.
More or less 10 years are a good enough period when a marriage gets stable and smooth after its ups and downs. Kids are born and sent to school. Family life is organized and systematized. Now, a woman has time to pursue her further education or career, part time or full time. She is still young and energetic enough to pursue and build her professional life believing she is a good wife and a successful mother.